Subject: Alexa, Call My Bae
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m dating a 47-year-old player. We’ve been together for almost two years and I told him marriage was the goal for me when we started dating and he said he wanted to be married too. I was at his house over the weekend and we were listening to music on his phone and his phone rang. He usually won’t have his phone connected to Bluetooth because we’ve had a mishap before when one of his co-workers called and his Bluetooth announced her. It was a lady named Carmen and I eventually found out that he and Carmen had sex before we started dating. He still hangs out with Carmen even though he knows I don’t like it. Back to the most recent incident… We were watching a movie and Alexa announced that he had a call from “My Bae.” He calls his niece “Bae” and she calls him a lot to ask for money. But my intuition kicked in and I wanted to be sure it was his niece. He took a shower and his phone was still connected to the Bluetooth. I went to the front of the house and said, “Alexa, call my bae.” I got Carmen’s voicemail. I confronted him in the shower and he calmly told me I was dead wrong for what I did and I should leave because I was not about to ruin his weekend. I left and days later, he still has not addressed who Carmen is to him. He jokingly tells me that I’m crazy but he still loves me. He keeps asking me to come over and said he can’t sleep without me. I’m not going to let this slide. Why is she “My Bae?” Should I leave him alone and let Carmen have him?